Friday 6 July 2012

Square 1

This will probably be irrelevant

When I did the last post almost 3 months ago it was my honest intention to take a little break, and then come back and finish the updates for the Sherlock promotions. Late, I know, but it would be for me cos I would like to have the chronology for later, and even though I didn't post I've been saving pics and videos so I could do it.

Well, you know what they say about even the best laid plans..



It became a stressful, sleepless period back in April cos life suddenly also became full of offline stuff, and in the end I had to give the fandom a rest, since real life isn't as easily shooed.
But back then it looked like maybe a couple of weeks of hectic schedule, but one week became two and two became three.. In the end my entire spring has been so rushed that there's barely been time for anything else, and when there has been time to go online I haven't particularly had the desire nor energy to post. I'd rather spend the precious free time catching up with friends and SHINee or just space out and watch Dangerous Boys or various We Got Married and Hello Babies or whatever.

On another, but still related note, something happened with me and SHINee.
I think that both the actual break from following them so closely, and then Sherlock promotions ending and them going back "home" to Japan to tour, they fell off the grid a little. Well, not really all the way off, but there's such a huge contrast between comeback periods and in-between periods. One second you're being constantly bombarded with updates and performances and it's like 2-3 schedules a day to maybe not hearing anything for a week, besides maybe the odd airport picture or whatever.
Anyway, that - put together with me probably subconsciously taking a step back cos they were stressing me out so much - apparently made a space. And I say "apparently" cos it wasn't something I was trying to make, it just happened.

I've always listened to all kinds of music and different groups and artists even before kpop, and I don't feel like I've ever tried to hide my love for all different..songs, not groups, I should say cos I really don't follow that many other groups closely enough to feel comfortable with voicing a public opinion about them.
And most of the time I don't give a crap about the group anyways cos to me, it's about the music of it all. So if I like a song, I'm gonna like a song, regardless.

And what's happened is that another group has wiggled it's way into the crack SHINee left open.
By no means does this mean I've dumped SHINee, and I still can't wait for their full album! I'll probably buy it in 725472 editions and versions and copies AS USUAL.
But it does mean that these days, since SHINee's off doing who-knows-what, maybe album stuff? - and Ho's filming Hana Kimi drama - I'm free to focus on other stuff.

I've listened to Teen Top since 향수뿌리지마 you came out almost a year ago, but it never amounted to anything besides the music, like SHINee at first. In fact, I thought they were a little weird and..yeah, let's leave it at that, like with SHINee at first.
But a few weeks ago something sparked, like with SHINee at first, and I've taken a nose-dive into the world of Angels, their official fandom name.
Fortunately, once my cat was out of the bag, a bag I wasn't even aware it was in it, turns out that a lot of people in tlist actually also like them, though maybe not as hardcore as me, so it's been nice to have people to share they joy of these 6 guys with ♥ 

But there has been "bumps" along the way, probably hence my need to over explain at this point. I won't go into the long sorted details, though, suffice it to say that in a weird way these issues spread out in a weird way throughout my life and inspired me to face and deal with a lot of things I've been pushing aside which subsequently have been weighing on my conscience and doing nothing good for my stress level in general.

I told you, this is irrelevant..

Long story short, I have decided to start anew.

To rid myself of stress factors in my life, including having to do the Sherlock updates.
To allow myself to focus on Tintap happily for now cos that's what I feel like doing.
To try to create a stress-free summer, and taking advantage of the fact that everyone else is away on holidays so I can not have things on my calendar every single day.
And to be free to take time to plan Korea which is less than 6 weeks away.

To delete unread stuff in my inbox which by now is close to 1000 emails..
Yes, a thousand, so maybe that gives you an idea of my level of analness and need for control cos I haven't been able to delete anything before I've read it. And this pile has been building for about 7-8 months now, but I do get about 40 new emails a day which means I don't get rid of the pile I only maintain it around the thousand.
But I'm just gonna skim now and probably delete tons without even looking, and it's such a liberating feel! 

So, not that I think anyone but me was expecting it at this point, but there will be no more Sherlock, and there will be no more SHINee like that.
I mean, there probably will be both SHINee and Tintap here and there, but this is my personal space, and even though kpop and fandom and online life takes up a very big part of my time and head space, this is not a fan blog like that.

감사합니다~^^

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