Tuesday, 2 August 2011


See this~

Beautiful polish, isn't it? I got it in Korea a year ago and it turned out to be the most amazing subtle golden brown/pinkish (I know it looks mostly pink in the pictures) with an insane amount of SPARKLY shimmer (but only from certain angles) kick-ass nail polish.

It was love at first coat

Believe it or not, but this right there is a milestone. That's right, a milestone.

For as long as I can remember I've had the nervous habbit of biting my nails. A lot. And since I'm a very high-strung person suffering from anxiety they used to be half the size in the pictures.

I always saw it as a barometer. If I were in a good phase I would bite less, and vice versa. There was a difference, even if you had to be me to notice it. To everyone else they were always just pretty horrible and I've always been really ashamed of my nails.
I would always position my hands so the nails would be as hidden as possible and if I had to hold on to say, a pole on the bus I would always curl in my fingers so they wouldn't show to the people around me. I always hoped no one would notice when I had to shake hands with people. And so on.

Now, my psychological issues are not going anywhere, and I gave up the dream of those long, gorgeous, French manicured nails a long time ago. As an enticement my parents once promised me nearly US$100 in today's currency. That may not seem like a lot, but this was almost 20 years ago and a hundred bucks was like, months of allowance all at once!
All I had to do was grow my nails long enough so you could see them when my palms were facing up.

Of course I couldn't do it and my faith that I would ever have beautiful nails and hands were kinda burried forever.

Fast forward a couple of decades and almost half of that in therapy for various reasons I might blab about another time, but things slowly started to turn around. Or so my nails were telling me! Because suddenly I started noticing them getting longer one by one, and me not biting them. I didn't even have the urge to.
The left ring finger was the last to finally cave in after a couple of months of being the only one napped at.

Then came a couple of months of these tiny fragile nails breaking off for no good reason, and me having to start all over. In time they all recovered well though - which still amazes me because I know what they looked like! - and now they're all pretty solid.

So yesterday after having given myself a mani aka filed them down, I suddenly decided that today was gonna be the day. THE DAY. The day I had longed for all those years as a girl wanting to dress up as and looking up to all the Hollywood glamour stars with their beautiful hands waving on red carpets everywhere.

Today I was gonna put on a coat of nail polish on my fingernails. Because that is how well I'm doing.

Good enough for polish...


  1. Happy for you. Milestones should always be celebrated. They are not easy to achieve.

  2. Thank you for saying that. It means a lot to me.
    I felt..uneasy writing this post because I realize it's something that will seem small or unimportant to most people.
    In the end I let my head out-rule my heart^^

  3. Yay Mia!!!!!!!!!!!! I just wrote this same thing on my blog because Lottie quit biting her nails too:) I think it is HUGE...I totally get it! Love you!!!